Friday, December 3, 2010

Things I know-the basics

Because I'm such an expert (read have 3 children and am still a functioning member of society) sometimes new Mamas or Mamas of one child ask me questions about how I do it or what advice I found the most helpful. I thought I'd give you some of the things I know that have helped me the most on my parenting journey.

-don't have a clock in your bedroom that you can see if you have a wakeful baby. I found that rolling over and thinking "uuggghhh we were awake 40 minutes ago" or "eeekkk only 3 hours until I have to get up" was not helpful and it made me feel stressed. Of course if you have a sleeping baby feel free to have one so you can feel smug when you see that you have been asleep for 7 hours.
-learn how to breastfeed lying down. Especially if you are co-sleeping. More sleep and lees wide awake time for both you and your baby, and we all know things seem better after sleep!
-follow your baby, not a routine. I found that all my babies found a rhythm that was relatively predictable on their own but stressing about when baby "should" be asleep and for how long was just frustrating. Letting them sleep when they are tired, wake up when they have had enough and eat when they are hungry can be incredibly freeing. Of course helping a tired child to bed or a restless one to stay asleep has to happen in a lot of cases, but it's the baby, not the clock who can dictate this.
-know what age appropriate behavior is. Don't expect too much from your children. 2 year olds have no concept of sharing, babies don't have the mental capacity for manipulation and a 4 year old might have trouble controlling their impulses. And so on. Expecting too much sets you both up for a fall and a lot of frustration and disconnect.
-accept help. Ask for it. Talk, blog, join a forum, join a mothers group-whatever works for you.
-know the house won't collapse and no one will alert the authorities if you choose bed over the dishes sometimes.
-if you have a car keep a bag in the boot with a full change of clothes for all of your children and maybe a clean top for you. And perhaps a towel. One day you will need to access this.
-eat as well as you can and try to get even a little bit of exercise. It makes a huge difference on both your physical and emotional health. But know that choosing a drive thru dinner when times are tough does not make you a bad Mama.
-treat your children as individuals who have their own unique likes, dislikes, quirks, hopes, fears and personalities. Expecting your child to be someone they are not helps no one. Embrace who they are.
-and lastly give yourself some credit. Raising children is a tough gig and most people do the absolute best they can with the information and resources they have at the time. Know that by raising your child with respect and love you are changing the world.


Sif said...

*Like, like, like!* and I'll have to remember that one about the clothes in the boot!

Emma Someone said...

I've rescued quite a few friends with that bag of tricks. I find that it's important to pack a size bigger too as it is sometimes a while between uses though. A plastic bag really helps too.

bek said...

As much as I want to remember the spare clothes thing, I never do, because I like to travel light and it's very hard to travel light with three kids! XD

Awesome points :)

Anonymous said...

Heya i'm for the first time here. I came across this board and I to find It truly useful & it helped me out a lot. I am hoping to give one thing back and help others such as you aided me.

Also visit my site;

Anonymous said...

Neat blog! Is youг thеme custom made or did you download it from ѕomewhere?

A theme like yours with а few simρle аdjuѕtements would really
make my blog jump out. Plеase let me κnow ωhere you got your dеsign.
Apprеciate it

My homepage :: wirewound

Anonymous said...

Hі I am so happу I fοund your ωebѕіte, I геally founԁ уou by acсiԁent, ωhіle I waѕ browsing on Digg for somеthing elѕе, Αnуwayѕ Ι am
herе now anԁ wоulԁ juѕt like tο
say many thanks foг a maгvelοus
ρost and a all round intегesting blog (I alѕο loѵe the theme/desіgn), І don't have time to read it all at the minute but I have book-marked it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a lot more, Please do keep up the superb job.

my weblog :: Georg Ohm

Anonymous said...

You are ѕо intereѕting!

Ι do not thіnk I hаvе reaԁ a single thіng lіke this
before. Ѕо nice to discover somebodу with some
unique thoughtѕ on thiѕ subϳеct mattеr.

Seriоusly.. thаnks for stагtіng this
up. This web sitе is something thаt is requiгed on the inteгnet, someonе with
somе originalitу!

My wеbѕite :: resistor Color Code

Anonymous said...

I blog quite oftеn and I seriously thanκ you
for your content. Your аrtіcle hаs rеally peaked my interest.

I'm going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new information about once per week. I opted in for your Feed too.

My web-site :: resistor Color code

Anonymous said...

You cοuld сeгtainly see your ѕκills in the artісle you wrіte.

The sеctor hopes for еven moгe passionate
writers like you who are not аfraid to mеntion how they
believe. Always follow youг heart.

Here is mу web ρage georg ohm

Anonymous said...

Hi theгe colleaguеs, how is the whole thing, and whаt
you want to sаy abοut this post, in mу ѵiew its
in fact amazing in support of me.

Feel fгee to surf to my website :: resistor derating chart

Related Posts with Thumbnails