Friday, February 3, 2012
In spite of
Think of these two phrases "because of" or "in spite of". In light of a few recent events and articles I'd like to see these turned on their heads.
The tragic death of a mother from a cardiac arrest following a planned homebirth has drawn a lot of criticism. It actually makes me feel sick that vultures in the media have not allowed the family of this woman some space and respect as they grieve-as they would a hospital birthing family.
They say it is "because of" her decision to birth at home that her life was put at risk. I beg to differ. I would say that IN SPITE OF the skilled care she received from her homebirth midwives and IN SPITE OF the fact that they clearly made a very informed choice a terrible tragedy occurred.
When these sad occurrences happen in hospital it is always "in spite of" them being there.
There has been some media attention for home education too. Most of it has been positive-but the comments. NEVER READ THE COMMENTS. I get so pissed when every little flaw in a child is blamed on the fact that they don't go to school. If a child attends school and is a bully or ends up in the unemployment line it is always assumed to be "in spite of" the fact they attended school. And if a home educated child is introverted or crap at math is it assumed to be "because of" the fact that they are not part of the school system.
Again, I beg to differ. Many home educated kids are introverted or crap at english/math/science. JUST AS THEY ARE IN SCHOOL. Institutionalizing kids does not change their strengths,weaknesses and personality traits.
Sometimes there is no blame. There is no "because of" to fall back on. Sometimes in spite of all the decisions you make for your family things just are the way they are. Good, bad and otherwise.